Slack Alice blogger is back again - with an award !!

So its been a couple of weeks and I finally got my 2.5stone award - yipee!  Down to 13stone 5lb lowest weight since about 2005.  I am trying desperately to get down to a real size 14 dress size - I have an awards ceremony to attend for work on the 17 November. Incidentally this is weigh night so I will be missing one, but am going to look for a Friday class that week so I can keep on track.

I really want to look good and don't want to buy a 16 as I will probably not wear it again if I keep losing weight being I am on the cusp of a 14 already, definitely on the bottom, tops are still just a bit tight.

I am going to go shopping tomorrow to the coast outlet shop in York and we will see how it goes, I can't look a mess as I am sitting on a table with the chief exec of the local council and various other senior managers... scary!!

So what else do I have to share, oh my group still doesn't have a new leader, we have about 20 regular weigh-ins at the moment but I don't think we are going to see any real growth until we have some consistency - If I was closer to target I think I would take it on, I know it could be a good one, the audience is out there they just need someone to take them under their wing and get them on track to a better, healthier life.

I have really begun thinking that a career in slimming world might be my next step - I really do believe losing weight with a healthy long term plan is life changing, I wanted to loose weight to look better; but you know what the real benefits -feeling fitter, having more energy and not using my weight as an excuse have been much bigger and more important changes - if I could bottle up the change losing weight has had on my life I think I could make a fortune.

When you are really overweight; when just tying your shoes makes you out of breath, when you loose interest in your life, can't be bothered to do anything around the house and start believing that this is you, this is all you deserve: The idea that you might one day love going to the gym, relish seeing the house clean and shiny - be much happier doing something than just sitting around and actually feel alive again is so unbelievable that you just continue to vegetate and get bigger.

Even after starting to loose weight, the littlest set backs are so hard to overcome when you just don't seem to be able to do anything right, you can make excuses for why you can't loose weight but the only real barrier to a happier you is you, and throughout your journey you will have days like that, days when its easier to say this is me, I can cope with that - but remembering that you already feel better and that you could feel better still if you continue to try is what you should hang on to.

The journey may be long -but its worth it and one day you will look in the mirror and smile - I know one day I will, well at least I might look at myself and not feel the urge to throw something at the mirror.

Here endeth my though for the day|!!

Happy slimming!!

Slimming World Weigh Day - Results of Challenge Week 7

Another week has passed,  despite a bit of an iffy weekend, I have lost another 1lb.  I am pleased, but this next award is still evading me. The diary challenge ends next Thursday so it would be nice to get my stone and a half as a fitting reward for completing it.   

I am wondering what my next challenge should be, it has definitely helped writing a food diary so I will probably keep it up; this time though I think I need a more definite goal rather than just a pledge to stick to it.  Assuming I get my goal for next week the next award would be for club 10 (for losing 10% of your starting weigh) which is only an additional couple of pounds, whilst at this rate it would probably take me until next year to get there it isn't exactly aiming high.  I could aim for my 2 stone award - realistically at my current weight loss rate that would take another 7 to 8 weeks.  I think that I should aim for doing it in 7 weeks, which would take me to 9 June.  So my next goal starting 28 April is to get my 2 stone award by 9 June 2011.

I went shopping today (Tesco has 25% off all clothing - it would be rude not to), I picked up 5 items in a size 16 without trying them on, got them home and they all fit.  So happy, I haven't worn a size 16 in about 5 years it is the first time since I have been on this diet attempt that I have had to go out and buy a smaller size; I still had size 18's in my wardrobe that I was squishing into when I was really a size 20 so the change between those sizes wasn't really noticable.  Despite the small losses the fact that I could buy clothes in a smaller size means that I am feeling really motivated again, the ounces may be slow to fall but the inches are definitely disappearing.

Results of Slimming World Lent Challenge Week 6

There are good weeks and there are bad ones; unfortunately two weeks of flexible syns have resulted in my first gain, 0.5lbs.  I am disappointed, I didn't go that far over my syns and it isn't like I have lost much for weeks.  I need to think how I can speed up my weight loss. To make it worse; I have been invited out for tea on Saturday, I can't imagine it is going to be low in syns and as flexible syns are not working for me at the moment, so that is another challenge.

Somedays it all seems so hard, having to worry about everything that passes your lips, constantly thinking about food.  Why can't I have been born with a fast metabolism, why did I put on all this weight again, why doesn't everything go the way you plan.

I am slipping into a bad mood so I am going to leave it at that, wish me luck!

My slimming story - results of challenge week 5.

Another week and another 1lb loss. I have lost for 5 weeks in a row now, a miracle for me.  I have a long history when it comes to my weight losses and gains, so if you are sitting comfortably I thought I might take a moment to share my story.

I wasn't a fat child, but I was tall for my age, I towered above my friends; I started puberty at 8 had to wear a bra at middle school,  this made me hate doing sport in front of people. When the underarm hair started sprouting at age 9 I would do anything to get out of going swimming, I hated being different, I remember once being picked on by some teenagers because I played with babies, I didn't, they were friends from my class.

The lack of exercise combined with comfort eating meant that I started to gain weight in high school, by then other kids were catching up with me, in height and bra size, but the damage to my self esteem had already been done.  I never felt I fitted in and used to spend every summer dreaming that I would lose weight, my spots would miraculously disappear and I would go back to school thin, pretty and popular.  I started my first diet at 13, well it was more a case of only eating one meal a day.  I started calorie counting the year after, I lost a bit of weight but was totally overshadowed in my great unveil by a girl who came back half the size, with a whole new look and bags of confidence.  Despite the diets I was pretty much constantly a size 14 I felt fat and uncomfortable especially when my legs would rub together when I walked (I would give my right arm to be that size now, even with the sore legs).

I met my first serious boyfriend when I was 17, we both lived at home with our parents and soon we were eating takeaways two or three times a week, going to the pub on a weekend and generally living as unhealthily as possible, a year later I was a size 16.  Not long after that I went through a pretty dark period in my life, to be honest after years of self hatred I finally flipped.  I don't have much memory of my eighteenth year, I went from one anti depressant to another and spent most of my time in bed. I turned down all the offers I had for university and avoided thinking about the future.  I finally found some medication which let me function, albeit in a flat emotionless way but I was out of bed and could make plans. I made it through my A-levels by some miracle and decided to go an study an art foundation course at another local college, by then I was a large size 16.

I started making some changes to my life during that year, I had art therapy and gradually stopped taking medication as I learnt to deal with my emotions and some of the issues I had been carrying around for years.  I also joined a slimming club one with a restrictive calorie controlled diet. I applied to study Art and English at university and for the first time in my life I was happy. I lost weight and by the time I started university I was a size 12.  University life is notoriously unhealthy and without sticking to the diet 100% it was no surprise that by the end of the second year I was squeezing into size 16 trousers. I realised I would have to do something about it, in another year I would be graduating and that meant photos, photos that parents would want to put up on the wall,  and I was determined not to look fat in them.

I joined Slimming World the first time in May 2002 and I weighed just under 14 stone. The diet was a revelation, I could eat loads and still lose weight. I worked out how to save syns for nights out and new what I could have at the Indian takeaway.  The best thing was that I finally realised my dream of coming back visibly thinner from a summer break. By the time I returned for autumn term I had lost 1 stone 9lb's and was getting loads of compliments.  By the time I left university I was back down to a size 12, by May 2004 I was at my target weight of 10 stone 2lbs and a size 8/10.

Since then I have gradually gained all the weight back again plus a few more stone, I have rejoined slimming world numerous times, lost half a stone and then quit again, gone back another stone heavier each time.  I have been a member at my current group since October 2009 when I rejoined I was 15stone 13, I messed about at it for over a year, but this time I didn't quit and now, I hope, I am finally moving towards my goal again; this time I am only aiming for 11 stone 3lb, that was the weight I was happiest at and one I hope is maintainable.

I am excited to see how the story develops and I hope like all the best stories, that it has a happy ending

Flexible Syns - because this week I need them!

I went out last night, I tried to be good but on totalling up the syns I seemed to have gone totally off the rails - oops! So for the first time ever (well in the 10 years I have been playing at Slimming World) I am going to give this flexible syn thing a go.

The theory is that every so often we need more than our allotted 105 syns a week, no amount of saving up or cutting down is going to give you enough flexibility for this particular week.  So you set yourself a goal of how many syns you are planning on having in one day, say an extra 30 above your normal allowance, you count them, if it isn't enough you just count some more.  You get to the end of the day write them all down and draw a line under them.  The next day you go back to having your regular allowance of 15 syns of whatever you usually have.

Yesterday I went out to Loch Fyne, I chose really well I thought - a sharing platter which was pretty much all fish.  Moules Provençal, which is mussels with a tomato sauce, and I left most of the sauce. I had one small slice of wholemeal bread and two tiny pieces of white French bread.  Then there was the wine 3 x 175ml glasses hmm 18 syns there; worse still there was the dessert, oh dear chocolate cheesecake with lemon sorbet and a spicy pineapple compote.  OK it was lovely but at approx 21 syns that really pushed up my count.  So adding it all up I had a total of 60.5 syns yesterday.

Best case scenario
I had already had 21 syns so that is 81.5 syns.  I usually have about 30 on a Saturday so I could count 30.5 as flexible syns.  That means I had eaten 51 non flexible syns. I had 29 non flexible syns today so that means I have had 80 non flexible syns and should have 25 non flexible syns left for the rest of the week.

Worse case scenario
I count all 60.5 as flexible syns so I only had 21 non flexible syns plus 29 non flexible syns today which gives me a total of 50 none flexible syns.  leaving me with 55 non flexible syns for the rest of the week.

The idea is not to feel deprived so I suppose it depends how the week goes I can choose to have between 25 and 55 syns and still remain in control.  I will obviously try for the lower amount, but will try not to throw the teddy out if I go closer to the upper amount.

To summarise I either have 105 (plus 30.5 flexible syns) or 105 (plus 60.5 flexible syns) or somewhere in the middle.  Do flexible syns work? We will see on Thursday.

Slimming World Challenge Week 4 Results

Another small loss, another 1lb down.  I am now back to where I was before the horrible 7lb in 2 weeks that kick started this challenge.  I can't believe it has taken twice as long to lose it as to gain it, I best keep that in mind when I think about falling from the wagon. 

Now that I am starting to get more mobile with my ankle (I drove mum and me to slimming today - yippee for me), I am going to have to start upping up my exercise, I am not talking anything overly active but I think I could manage to do something everyday maybe go for a walk or swimming. 

I really want a 2lb loss next week, I dread writing that as when I set a target I usually go off track, but I want my stone and a half award. 

Check out my food diary here: Slimming World Challenge.

The Diet Struggle Continues !

I am having a bad diet week, I am still within the weekly syns but am struggling to maintain focus.  I can't work out why I get like this.  Is it boredom or a sense of why try so hard for such a small loss? I seem to get to week 4 and lose motivation. Keeping the diary is the only thing that is keeping me on plan at all, I nearly stopped at the weekend when I was eating everything in sight, but I wrote it all down on a scrap of paper and sat down while the kids were watching Karate Kid and worked out the syns.

I very nearly ate a McDonald's on Sunday, I checked the syns before we set off and decided that there was no way I was wasting that many on junk food; so while he and the not so little dears stuffed their faces, I had a coffee and a free bag of fruit (from an instant win on the monopoly game) instead.  OK I admit it... I stole a single chip, a small bite of a cheeseburger (well we won that too - so it was free), and a sip of banana milkshake - but they are all counted and in the diary, I figure I showed real restraint not giving in and eating the second free cheeseburger.

I made the smash pizza on Saturday, but I forgot to take a photo - I will take one next time I make one.  It was very filling, I think I made the base a bit too dry and I didn't roll it thin enough but other than that it was pretty good.  I didn't feel too deprived when they were eating the proper stuff.  I followed the Smash pizza recipe on Jess Collings' wonderful blog;  although I had mozzarella, olives, pepperoni and roast chicken on mine.

I also made some chickpea snacks thanks to a helpful hint from someone in my SW group.  I drained a can of chickpeas, laid them out on a baking tray, sprayed with fry light and sprinkled with season all and cooked for 15 minutes.  I ate them still warm, was a bit like those hot peanuts you get in bars - quite yummy.

Slimming World Challenge Week 3 Results

Tonight I lost 1lb, not exactly jumping for joy but that is three losses in a row.  I didn't feel like I had lost much so it wasn't a surprise but I would like to see at least 2lb next week.  The kids are staying this weekend which is always difficult, they are really fussy eaters and it isn't worth the arguments making them eat slimming world too.  I am going to try Slimming World pizza on Saturday night then they can have regular pizza without tempting me.

I will share my results later.

I find the variation in weight loss frustrating, 1lb, 4lb then 1lb again.  Why when we stick to the plan does the amount we lose vary so much?

My other half thinks that I am always a week behind on my weight loss, so the 4lb loss was a result of the first week on the challenge, and this weeks was the result of the 80 odd syns I had on week 2.  This week was just over 70 syns so hopefully that should be somewhere between the two.

There is always the issue of hormones, If we throw them into the mix,  last week was also star week and I always lose more then.  Then there is how much you eat and drink on weigh day, I never eat exactly the same so if I haven't digested the food then it might weight heavier some weeks than others.  There is also fluid retention as a result of exercise, hormones or medication.  Then there is the clothes, I don't always wear the same thing so that can add or lose a lb. When you think about it, there is no surprise that sometimes you have an unexpected gain or lose more than you thought you would.

I was feeling a bit down about the size of the loss before I started this post, but when you put it all in perspective like that, it doesn't seem too bad.

Click here for my full food diary for the Slimming World Food Diary Lent Challenge.

Slimming World Internet Recipe Trials

Mum and I decided to experiment with some Slimming World recipes we had seen online for tea tonight.  We had both independently come across recipes for Diet Coke Chicken, and were intrigued to try it.

The basic recipe was

4 skinless chicken breasts
2 onions
1 can diet coke
1 tsp worcestershire suace
3 tbsp pasatta

Basically you fry off the chicken and onion until the chicken is starting to colour then add the other three ingredients and cook off until the sauce has thickened.  We tested the sauce and decided it was a bit bland for our tastes so added the following

1 tsp chilli powder (ideally this would have been fried off with the meat at the start)
1 tsp chicken bovril
another tbsp pasatta

We cooked off the extra ingredients and served it with boiled rice.

The added heat from the chilli and the salt from the stock definitely gave it a more rounded flavour.

I think I was impatient to get eating as it is still a bit steamy - oopps!

The second experiment came courtesy of a fellow blogger at Slimming World Recipes, she has some interesting recipes and this one caught my eye, well who wouldn't say no to syn free crisps.

I was very impressed by how like crisps they were, so moreish and dead easy to do.  I have a horrible feeling the slimming world mafia may not approve, they can be awful funny about things like this.  But assuming I don't gain weight this week, I will definitely try these again.

Slimming World Black Forest Roulade





8.5 syns for the whole roulade





Yummy and less than 1.5 syns per portion

Serves 6

3 large eggs
8 tbsp artificial sweetener
2-3 drops vanilla essence
2 level tbsp plain flour
1 level tbsp cocoa
1 tbsp hot water
8oz fresh cherries (stoned fresh or desfrosted frozen)
255g quark








1. Preheat oven to 200 degrees C/Gas 6. Put the eggs, sweetener and vanilla essence in a bowl and whisk until light and thick. Fold in flour and cocoa powder and add the hot water. Spoon into a 29.5 x 23cm/13 x 8 inch swiss roll tin lined with greaseproof paper.
Bake for 8-10 mins.

2.Turn out onto a piece of grease proof paper, peel away the backing paper and trim the edges. Roll up and leave to cool.

3.Reserve a few cherries for decoration. Unroll the sponge and spread with the quark (add sweetner and vanilla essence to taste, set some aside for the topping) leave a 4cm/1.5 inch border. Reroll and decorate with reserved quark mixture and cherries.

4. Cut into 6 slices and serve.

8.5 syns for the whole roulade, less than 1.5 syns per slice.

Slimming World Challenge Week 2

Hip hip hooray, I lost 4lb's, and even better I am Slimmer of the Week.  I am really pleased, but considering that last time I had a good loss it was followed by two huge gains I am a little apprehensive about overdoing the celebration.

So far however, the challenge seems to be  going well, a total loss of 5lb in two weeks.  I have 6 weeks go to the end of the challenge, it will be interesting to see where I am by then.  I would really like my 2 stone award, which is 9 lbs away.

I know it is possible as long as I stay motivated, I feel more passionate about sticking to the diet than I have in years, I actually want to stick to it, for me.  Maybe that is it, the missing link - all this time I have wanted to be thinner because of what other people might think, I have wanted to be someone else.  For the first time in ages, I just want to be me, I want to lose weight to make me happy not anyone else.

If you would like to see my food diaries I am writing them up on the Slimming World Lent Food Diary Challenge page.

Slimming World Food Diary

I am still reeling from shock, I have gained 7lb, in just two weeks! Half a stone - I feel so annoyed, I won't make excuses, but I will say I didn't expect that size of gain.

The shock has made me determined to stick 100% to the diet this week. I really hope that the result will be a large loss, I am so disappointed I really wanted my two stone award by now, but I am back up at a total loss of less than a stone after this recent disaster.

I feel that there are some clear reasons for losing weight and I want to write them here for the world to see, that way I can't hide from them.

Reason 1: I want a sex life! How is that for brutally honest I think I may be finding my virginity again it really has been that long. I know I am unattractive and I have lost confidence in that department, but I miss feeling sexy and desirable; I don't expect to look like a page three model; just vaguely attractive.

Reason 2: I am reliably informed the PCOS symptoms will reduce if I lose weight down to a healthy level.

Reason 3: I hope losing weight will increase my fertility and my chances of conceiving (see reason 1)

Reason 4; I have little control or clue how to deal with anything else in my life, I think concentrating on weight loss as my primary goal for a while might lead me to resolving some of the other issues I am avoiding dealing with.

I promise to be good from now on, in fact for lent I am giving up cheating on slimming world! I am starting early so here is my food intake for the last 3 days.

Thursday Eve

Spaghetti with Quark, tinned tomatoes, 1 tbsp pesto (4 syns) and Quorn fillets.

1 Banana muller light and 1 plum.

Daily total 4 syns

Friday

Scrambled egg, fatless bacon, and tinned tomatoes.

Butternut squash and red pepper soup.

Pork loin and bovril on 4 ryvitas (HE).

Rhubarb muller light

Fresh Fig

Steak, SW chips, salad and 1 tspHelmans XL mayo (1/2 syn).

1 Hi Fi delux bar (6 syns).

Daily total 6.5 syns

Saturday

Bacon, dry fried egg, wholemeal bread (HE and 2.5 syns)

Butternut squash soup

SW lamb rogan josh, sw chicken balti, rice

4 x SW vegetable samosas (4 syns)

1 x Weight Watchers naan bread (5.5 syns)

2 x Coors Light beers (9 syns)

1 tsp lime pickle (0.5 syns)

1 x galaxy ripple (9 syns)

Daily Total 30.5 syns

Sunday

Bacon, scrambled egg, baked beans, 2 x weight watchers sausages (1 syn).

Plum

Roast chicken, dry roast potatoes, mashed potato, spring cabbage, carrots, leeks, yorkshire pudding (7 syns) and Gravy (4.5 syns)

2 x Alpen light (HE)

Daily Total 12.5 syns

Total so far this week 53.5 syns

The weekend is always the hardest part so I am pleased with how I have done so far, just got to keep it up.

Update will be posted tomorrow.

For the full food diary for this week and the whole of lent please see the Slimming World Food Diary Lent Challenge.